How to Talk to [Mamí & Papí] about Anything

Telling Mom About Using Cannabis and Being a Budtender

Episode Notes

Bianca is passionate about cannabis. She even has a podcast about it! When she started working in the cannabis industry, she finally opened up to her mom about all of it. And, a cannabis entrepreneur and investor helps us demystify the plant, the history, the science and the myths for our loved ones.

You can find Bianca's podcast here

Featured Expert: 

Khadijah Adams is a business coach, public speaker and cannabis investor. In 2014, when the state of Colorado legalized cannabis for recreational consumption, Khadijah sold her business and all of her worldly possessions with the exception of her car, cell phone, clothes, and computer, and moved to Colorado to get in on the "Green Rush". By late November of that year, Khadijah and a business partner formed Marijuana Investment & Private Retreat aka MIPR Holdings, LLC, a cannabis consulting and investor relations firm located in Aurora, Colorado where she served as the founder and senior managing partner for 3-1/2 years. MIPR Holdings, LLC was later acquired by C. E. Hutton, LLC, a business development and management firm in Denver, Colorado where Khadijah currently sits on the Board of Managers as the Vice President. She is also the Founder of The GreenStreet Academy, an online educational platform that teaches the basics of investing in the marijuana industry, and the co-author of The Minority Report, annual marketing analysis of Minority-owned companies in the cannabis and hemp industries. Khadijah sits on the Advisory Board of The Color of Cannabis (TCC) and is on the Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Committee (DEIC) of the National Cannabis Industry Association (NCIA). Khadijah is also the Founder of Girl Get That Money, and is a public speaker empowering women by starting where they are in their process in business, or in life and helping them design and execute a plan of action that will take their business and personal life to the next level into their journey. Learn more about her work here.

If you loved this episode, be sure to listen to My Divorce, My Parents, And Me, and Telling Them I'm Moving In With Boyfriend.

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Episode Transcription

Juleyka Lantigua-Williams:

Today, my guest is Bianca. She’s been enjoying cannabis recreationally for a while, but when she started working in the industry, she thought it was time to have an open conversation about it with her Dominican mom. Let’s get into it. 

Bianca Blanche:

My name is Bianca Blanche. I’m the host of That Budtender Podcast. I am also a cannabis advocate and journalist. I live in L.A. and in my household we called our parents mommy and daddy. So, I first tried cannabis in the Dominican Republic when I was 16, back in high school, but I didn’t start consuming regularly and recreationally until I was 19, in college, living in New York at that point. My dad is Italian American. He’s a third generation American, so there was never really a need for me to hide it, or be ashamed of it, because I knew he himself had consumed and was fine with it. 

My Dominican mother, on the other hand, had a really hard time with it. She had a really hard time accepting what I was doing, that it was a part of my lifestyle. It didn’t really become a conversation until I was actually working in the cannabis industry as a budtender back in 2015. So, at that point I was kind of forced to come out of the cannabis closet and have that conversation with her. 

My mom would be like, “Why do you do that? It’s a gateway drug. You’re gonna ruin your life.” My mom’s never been high in her life, so she also has no idea what she’s talking about or the experience itself, and I have to admit it did put a wedge in our relationship for a couple of years because I was so passionate about what I was doing professionally. I wasn’t willing to give that up. It was kind of like I’ve been consuming cannabis this whole time and you had no idea. There’s no point for you to be upset about it now. I’m still the same person. 

My mom finally came around and started to respond more positively when she herself got to experience the effects of CBD, which is a non-psychoactive component of the plant. So, she now uses the topicals, and uses it for pain management, and enjoys that method, but I think giving her the facts, and I think also knowing why I consume cannabis personally, and being able to express that, it made it digestible for her, and then her actually experiencing it, I think it took away that stigma. 

So, I finally got my mom to try it, unfortunately because she was in a lot of pain. She is a pastry chef in New York, so she spends the majority of her days on her feet, super long hours. Her back, it's’ not great, and these creams, these topicals, it was basically kind of a last resort for her, because she personally doesn’t like pharmaceuticals either. So, I’m like, “Okay, if you’re not gonna go with Western medicine, I need to at least give you some alternative medicine,” something that frankly, people have been practicing for centuries. 

After receiving relief from the CBD topicals, after all these years of being against cannabis and saying that it’s a gateway drug, and there’s nothing medicinal about it, she was shocked. She was kind of like… You know, like the Dominican moms that kind of like, “Mira, ¡pero eso funciona!” You know? I was like, “What have I been telling you?” I’m my mom’s dealer now. 

Lantigua-Williams: 

I cannot even imagine that conversation with my mom. Nope. Won’t do it. Can’t do it. I refuse. But I know that as the public accepts cannabis, marijuana, and related products, more of us first gens might find ourselves in a conversation with our parents about our enjoyment of it and even possibly our employment in the cannabis industry. So, to help us figure out how to broach the subject, I did what I always do. I called in an expert. 

Khadijah Adams:

My name is Khadijah Adams. I am a business empowerment coach. I’m also an entrepreneur and a cannabis investor. I mainly practice within the cannabis, hemp, and CBD industries. 

Lantigua-Williams:

So, Khadijah, you heard Bianca’s story. What did you hear when you heard it? 

Adams: Well, I heard something that’s really similar that a lot of people face, and that is being able to tell your parents, especially when your parents are from a particular background or a particular time. It really is a very common storyline amongst many people, because you have parents who come from a spiritual background and parents who grew up during the time of reefer madness. Reefer madness was actually started by Harry Anslinger. He was our first drug czar. He actually attached cannabis to unsolved crimes, and he attached either a Black man, or an Asian man, or a Mexican man to that crime. Hearst, who owned the majority of the media, put out all kinds of flyers and then they made a movie called Reefer Madness. You can actually find it on YouTube, so a lot of cannabis consumers, they really have a hard time explaining it to their parents. 

Lantigua-Williams:

So, for someone who enjoys cannabis recreationally, what are some of the talking points that you would suggest that they start with if they want to have the conversation with their parents or their family? 

Adams: The way that I would go about it is I would say, “You know, mom and dad, what I found out about Reefer Madness really wasn’t true at all. Here’s the information that I found. Can you believe that we’ve been lied to all of these years? And come to find out that cannabis was actually used long before aspirin and pretty much all the medicines had cannabis in it. Did you know that mom and dad?” And kind of pique their interest so now it will have them wanting to do more research, as well. 

Lantigua-Williams: 

So, you know that parents have this mortal fear, like that their child is gonna be the one kid who dies from it. How do we assuage those terrors that our parents naturally have because of the misinformation that they’ve been dealt? 

Adams: Absolutely. And we do that by providing them with relevant information, factual information, and statistical information. Sharing with them that no one has ever died from cannabis, and you know, you can’t get addicted to cannabis. Ask them some thought-provoking questions, like can you imagine the many people who died from cancer and all these other serious diseases, and maybe cannabis could have helped them? 

Lantigua-Williams:

At least made them more comfortable in the process. 

Adams: Right. Exactly. 

Lantigua-Williams:

Yeah. All right, I have to ask you. How did your story happen? 

Adams: Well, first of all, I was very young when I first consumed cannabis, and it is very controversial my age, and I’m very transparent about it. I was 11 years old when I began using cannabis. And believe it or not, it helped with my anxiety, and I didn’t even know it helped with my anxiety. I was just being mischievous. I actually went into my mom’s room because I smelled the cannabis and it wasn’t like the cigarette that she had smoked before, so I said, “Okay, I’m gonna try that.” And when she left, I did. She already had her little joints rolled up and everything, so I just grabbed one. I mean, I was 11. 

I actually didn’t consume it regularly. I just tried it as a kid. And then when I became older, I actually began to consume cannabis and realized when I first got into the cannabis industry, which was in 2014… I’m originally from Sugar Land, Texas. I actually sold everything I had except for my clothes, my computer, my cell phone, and my car, and I drove from Sugar Land, Texas, to Colorado to get into the industry. It was there that I began to learn and reeducate myself about cannabis, and I found out how medicinal it was, and it really changed my perspective because initially I was coming into the industry to get rich. 

Most people are like, “Okay, let’s go and make money,” and that’s how I was, to be quite honest with you. But once I began meeting people with all types of ailments, it was just like, “Wow.” So, it kind of changed my perspective and said, “Okay, wait a minute. This is more than just money. This is about helping people. Giving them alternatives that they can choose from.” Cannabis can help in so many different ways, and so it just made me change my perspective. 

Lantigua-Williams:

I have sort of like a social political question for you, because for example, I grew up in the South Bronx in the ‘80s and ‘90s, where the crack epidemic and drug addiction really ravaged Black and Brown neighborhoods, and so a lot of people in my generation, in my parents’ generation, have a really complex relationship with the notion of now cannabis being legalized, being in the open market, creating industry, creating investment opportunities. What’s your advice for people who are wrestling with those kinds of tensions because of their lived experiences? 

Adams: Well, first of all, the first thing I want to share with them is that cannabis is totally different from cocaine or crack. You know, crack and cocaine is also… It’s horrible. It is a drug that can, people can become addicted to, whereas cannabis is not. Cannabis, if you have an addictive personality, of course you can become addicted to anything, and so I actually just share with them to do your research and be diligent about your research. Don’t believe what you read, and what you hear, and what you’ve heard, but really take your time and do the research and you’ll find that a lot of people who have been consuming cannabis have either come away from those hard drugs because cannabis has helped them, and some of them have never even turned to hard drugs from cannabis. It’s not a gateway drug. 

Lantigua-Williams:

So, now let’s imagine that someone wants to take the step that Bianca took, which is that she wanted to become a professional in the field. How does that conversation go? 

Adams: Wow, and that’s a doozy, because first of all, we have to really convince them that cannabis is okay. But now we want to convince them that we’re gonna be okay working in the cannabis industry, and so you want to start out by sharing with your parents what you’re gonna actually be doing in the industry, whether you’re gonna be touching the plant, or not touching the plant. You may be working in marketing or some other ancillary business. You may not even be in contact with the plant. And so, really share with them what it is exactly you’re gonna be doing and how you’re gonna be benefiting. Not how much money you’re gonna be making, but who you’re actually gonna become by working in this industry. The cannabis industry is lacking in diversity, so we need more Black and Brown people to get involved, whether as business owners, entrepreneurs, investors, or employees. Every single vertical that is in traditional industry, you’ll find over in the cannabis industry, such as advertising, marketing, if you’re an attorney in traditional industry, how you can actually come into the cannabis industry, learn about the cannabis laws, and actually start practicing and focusing on that specialty. 

There’s all types, like business coaches, for instance. We’re prevalent now in the cannabis industry because it’s so needed due to the lack of professionalism. And now that we have more professionals coming in from traditional industry, when they call me for consultations, I actually like to find out what they’re currently doing and how can we actually incorporate that into the cannabis space. 

Lantigua-Williams:

All right, so Bianca got her mom to try the topical oils, right? The infused oils, because her mom was having a lot of physical pain and that really helped. So, can you give folks some advice about some of the ways that they can introduce the concept, the product, the usage, to their families and to their parents?

Adams: Yes. Absolutely. First you want to start, again, like I said, with research. Bringing the education, bringing the educational materials to your parents, and bringing them samples of the product, and share with them. Make sure you get the CBD that is all CBD, maybe an isolate with no THC, and explain to them what is the difference between the THC and the cannabidiol or CBD and let them know that it’s not psychoactive and so many people have been helped with it. And even produce some types of testimonials from other people who may be suffering from what they’re suffering from. 

Lantigua-Williams:

Khadijah, thank you so much. This has been wonderful. 

Adams: And thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it. 

Lantigua-Williams:

All right, let’s recap what we learned from Khadijah. Dispel the myths. Talk to your parents about how our understanding of marijuana products, the science behind them, as well as the decriminalization of it has influenced you and our society. Information without judgment is key here. Show, don’t tell. If your parents are open to it, share topical or ingestible products that can help demystify the effects of CBD, for example. And remember, encourage questions. Ask your parents what they want to know and give them truthful and factual information in ways that ease acceptance and dispel fear. 

Thank you so much for listening and thank you for sharing us. Thank you for the reviews that you’ve been leaving us. Leave some more. We love reading those. How to Talk to [Mamí and Papí] About Anything is an original production of Lantigua Williams & Co. Virginia Lora produced this episode. Kojin Tashiro mixed it. Manuela Bedoya is our social media editor. Cedric Wilson is our lead producer. I’m the show’s creator, Juleyka Lantigua-Williams. On Twitter and Instagram, we’re @TalktoMamiPapi. Please, please subscribe and rate us on Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, Spotify, or anywhere you listen to your favorite podcasts. Bye, everybody. Same place next week. 

CITATION: 

Lantigua-Williams, Juleyka, host. “Telling Mom About Using Cannabis and Being a Budtender.” 

How to Talk to [Mamí & Papí] About Anything, 

Lantigua Williams & Co., January 11, 2021. TalkToMamiPapi.com.